I admit it – I was an eye-roller. When my Grandmother spoke to me about just how challenging things were for her growing up I would respectfully listen then allow my eyes to deviate somewhere near the back of my head as I turned away (taking a huge slice of jam sponge cake with me). It never occurred to me at the time that these stories were important to my development, that anecdotes of saving all year for an outfit would be character inspiring. I […]

Author:  Maggie Dent

Family rituals strengthen the sense of warm connectedness in families. This makes sense, given that the number one biological need for every human is the hunger to belong, and to be accepted, valued and loved.

The disruption of life in 2020 saw many families unable to go about their normal activities, and for many, family rituals reclaimed their valuable position. For some, it was simply going for walks together, riding bikes together, baking, or watching movies together complete with homemade popcorn.

So how can families create and maintain small rituals that make such a difference?

Turn routines into rituals

Bedtime routines […]

Author: Michael Grose

In a recent conversation, a 16-year-old told me how he’s enjoyed some great conversations with his father since the COVID-19 pandemic. What I heard from this young man was that his father is not just an affable person but also a very ‘askable’ parent.

The young man told me that he could talk to his dad about anything, which I suspect would be music to his father’s ears. I imagine that many parents would love to hear their kids say that about them. The notion of being a parent that young people can discuss personal problems with and […]

Author: Michael Grose

Following the 4 March Justice rallies, families have been urged to talk to their children about consent. Many parents are unsure where to start and how to go about it. Here are some ideas to assist parents in this most important topic.

Start the consent ball rolling from an early age

Consent education begins with adults teaching and modelling respectful treatment related to children’s development stages. Holding discussions about body boundaries, checking in with feelings, respecting the feelings and voices of others, and listening to children’s concerns are the types of behaviours that will help you develop a culture […]

Author: Michael Grose

That doesn’t mean that such families are devoid of conflict or criticism, but that they are generally pleasant environments to be part of.

One way to increase good feelings in your family is to increase the number of compliments kids hear at home.

As a general rule, the ratio of compliments to criticism should be around five to one. That is, there should be five times more positive, affirming comments than negative comments.

In unhealthy families, this ratio is often reversed. Five negative comments for every one positive comment makes for a pretty toxic environment.

How does your family rate on this scale?

If […]

Author: Michael Grose

Regularity and routine are the agents of sleep. It takes discipline to adhere to and commitment to making sleep a high priority. Helping kids understand how their body clock works, assisting them to work out their optimal bedtime and putting lifestyle habits in place can help them get the sleep they need to maximise their learning, wellbeing, development and overall performance. Here are some tips to help:

Understand the body clock

Sleep is regulated by a 24-hour body clock that manages the secretion of melatonin to send us to sleep and cortisol to wake us up. This amazing body […]

Author:  Michael Parker
Source: Sydney Morning Herald, 28 February, 2021

Talk to your child about sexual consent- because schools can’t manage this alone.

The stories of young women being sexually assaulted at parties that have emerged in recent weeks have been individually shocking and cumulatively harrowing. Those who have shared them have called for hundreds of schools – especially boys’ schools – to step up and do more by radically improving our education on consent, gender relations and respect, something I and many of my colleagues at other schools will be doing.

The stories also call for something many will find much harder: […]

Author: Michael Grose

“Share your things with your brother. Don’t be so selfish!”

If you, like me, still have this message rattling around your head then you’ll know how much kids’ selfishness is frowned upon parents. It sits alongside negative terms such as spoilt, bratty and mean-spirited.

I’ve long sung the praises of parents who promote a sense of generosity and giving in their kids. I hold the firm belief that one of the central tasks for parents is to socialise children so that the next generation has a strong sense of civic-mindedness.

There’s a place for developing self-ishness in children, but not the […]

Author: Dr Justin Coulson

Parents and teachers influence children most during their first twelve years of life. We have less influence over teens as they become increasingly independent and look to their peers for guidance and approval.

The following strategies will help ensure that you have a positive influence on children at any age.

1.Be available

Nothing says “You matter” more than a busy parent giving a child undivided attention. Research has established that children whose parents are emotionally present for their kids have better social, academic, and wellbeing outcomes than those whose parents aren’t available.

2. Be warm

Sometimes we can forget that our […]

Author:  Michael Grose

“Don’t do it!”

I sat in the back of the classroom and I saw a fourteen-year-old student taunt his teacher in a way that only young adolescent boys can do.

The teacher asked the student to get back to work and stop disturbing others, reminding him that his behaviour was out of order.

The student grudgingly resumed his task. But just before he put his head down, he threw out a comment about it being a stupid piece of work that he had to do.

This young fella’ threw down an ‘imaginary rope’ (the last word, a taunt, a jibe, a […]